Liverpool Travel Review

Liverpool

Travel Review

I can't understand why people don't like Ryanair. I really think they look at it the wrong way. The whole experience of booking a flight with the much maligned carrier needs to be viewed as a game. If you can fulfill all the conditions the airline imposes, and win the game, you can fly for next to nothing. Correspondingly, each “failure” results in a “fine”, whether its not possessing a Visa Electron card or your desire to bring more than a single carry on bag.

With this in mind, I had trawled the Ryanair site looking for a truly cheap return ticket to a major European city. I found Liverpool for one day (or just over 21 hours) for €15. It would have been €5, but I dropped points by booking with regular Visa. So, cue the Mission: Impossible intro music because here comes Liverpool in (slightly under) a day.

22:00 - Tuesday

Here is what you need to get from the main entrance of Dublin Airport in under ten minutes. Online check-in, one carry on bag with all guns, knives and most especially containers over 100ml removed, no queue at security, and finally, if you're flying with Ryanair, legs of steel because you know your boarding gate is going to be at the far end of the terminal. All of these things combined, and as I pistoned my way to my gate, I contemplated that this time all the cherries might line up to produce my most hassle free flying experience to date. These thoughts faded as I noticed one hundred Real Madrid fans waiting to board my flight.

23:00

The plane performed a dip of roller coaster proportions on take off, which left me on edge for the rest of the flight. The only thing keeping my mind off the persistent turbulence was the chatty Italian girl next to me who didn't let the fact that I had a death grip on the chair in front dissuade her from carrying on a largely one-sided conversation.

The Madrid fans were quiet for most of the flight, despite the odd nihilistic whoop when it seemed as if the plane might go down.

0:00 – Wednesday

John Lennon Airport. On the verge of kissing the ground when I exited the aircraft, I relented when I was hit by the wind and rain. I said my goodbyes to chatty Italian girl and went to find a bus to my hostel. Liverpool has recently stopped running night buses; something which I and three fellow travelers only found out after waiting at the bus stop for twenty minutes. A taxi ride for four was the next best alternative.

1:00

I was staying at the Embassie hostel. The vague directions given by the taxi driver lead to more rainy wanderings than I would have liked, but eventually I found my way there, to be greeted by more Spaniards than you could shake a novelty straw donkey at.

I haven't stayed in hostels alone much, and although I appreciate the monetary savings,the demands made on my sleeping patterns might prove just enough to force me to graduate to budget hotels. For instance, its a special ability, an innate talent that hostel owners have to apportion one snorer per room. I don't know, or care to know how they do it, I only wish it would stop.

One of the nicest things which you could say about the Embassie decor is that its basic, something which a hostel dweller cannot malign. It gives no clues that it was once the Venezuelan Consulate, but its clean and that's enough. The major plus points to staying here are that the staff are friendly in the extreme, the price is right (£15 Sunday to Thursday) and you get all the tea and toast you can drink/eat. www.embassie.com

7:00

A few hours later I awoke and, pleasantly surprised that I had not been sodomised in my sleep, showered, ate enough toast to constitute breakfast and lunch and began the short walk to town.

8:30

The Anglican Cathedral and entrance to Chinatown, which I passed by, are both worth a look, as are the shops, the lands which exchange rates forgot. The euro has weakened slightly since it reached near-parity with the pound, but sterling shopping still represents the next best thing to taking a trip to the States.

10:00

All museums in Liverpool are free (the ones I visited anyway). Laden down with goods, I started with what turned out to be the best museum in Liverpool, the Walker Art Gallery. The John Moores Prizewinners exhibit featured the most vibrant and interesting paintings, including the above birdcage. Avoid the current Fashion v Sport exhibit. Its a waste of time. The George Always painting series isn't too hot either.

11:30

The Liverpool Museum is more child oriented, relying on multimedia and live exhibits to make its point. I spent most time in the Natural World section (pretending to be a dinosaur, if you must know) and found that most of the fun had evaporated from the experience before I reached the fourth floor.

1:20 PM

A quick lunch later and I hit the slavery section of the Liverpool Maritime Museum. I generally like museums that are long on information, and this one did not fit that description at all. Large empty spaces abounded on what should be a packed floor. Those that were filled did little to give an overall picture of the history of human ownership. An ironically all white amateur dramatics group filled another space with a heavy handed and condescending portrayal of exactly how much screaming and bad acting took place on board a slave ship. The highlight, if it can be called that, of this lowlight was the stark reminder that less than 90 years have passed since the above picture was taken.

2:00

No visit to Liverpool would be complete without engaging in a Beatles related activity, so just before two I boarded the Magical Mystery Tour Bus to be whisked away to several Beatles related sights such as Strawberry Fields, Penny Lane and the former homes of the four band members. I booked on the day, but would advise doing so further in advance as I got the second last seat.

The tour itself is excellent, and along with the Walker Art Gallery, is my pick of the trip*. Things started off quite rockily though, as one of the non-English speaking patrons *coughRealMadridfancough* decided to conduct a loud telephone conversation as he couldn't understand the tour. One bad tempered conversation later though, and we were a much quieter and more civilised bus. I won't ruin the tour by writing any of the interesting facts but in true Murder Mystery-ruining style I will say that Mark Chapman did it.

4:30

After being dropped off by the coach, I had time for a quick look around the Tate Liverpool Gallery. The Tates are known for offering more modern (synonymous with crap) art. For the most part I would agree with that. There are some gems like the Warhol paintings and a Picasso, but a tilted head and scrunched up nose greeted most offerings.

5:15

A bus back to the airport and a flight that left early took me out of Liverpool before the fuse ran too low.

Liverpool offers just enough to do in one day, a slogan that won't be on their tourist website any time soon. I packed in a lot, simply because I booked purely based on frugality and before I determined what sights were worth seeing. In hindsight, and after two days sleep, a more sedate pace is to be advised.

As for the people, Liverpudlians are generally helpful and friendly, if you can keep yourself from saying “Alright, Alright. Calm Down, Calm Down” to them every time they speak

Liverpool was a real find, mostly because I wasn't expecting to find much of anything. Its a recommend for me. Just give the Slavery Museum as wide a berth as a 21st Century advocate for its reinstatement.

8/10


*Trademark Pending